Me vs. The Waiting Game: College Decisions and Crochet Hooks

Well, guys. I’m a senior. 

High school is about to be over. I’m antsy and restless, honestly. I’ve been obsessively watching move in vlogs for the schools I want to go to. I got one acceptance super early (can’t tell you guys just yet!!) and now I cannot WAIT for the rest to come.

But it’s only September 1st.

September 1st.

My last September 1st as a high schooler. My last couple of months before I’m a legal adult. 

It feels odd to be on the cusp of such a milestone. I’m a kid, but I’m not. So much is happening for me, so much change and growth, and yet I’m just another teenage girl sitting at home writing a blog post on another normal Monday evening.

I’m editing my novel! My debut. Though I am considering putting together a poetry book…I have dozens of dozens of poems just sitting in my notes app. And I could self publish a poetry book way faster than I can get a deal on my debut.

Just something I’m thinking about.

I started learning to crochet! I’m currently working on my first project: a head wrap. It’s simple and it’s helping me practice my basic stitches. But I really enjoy it. I’m happy to have a new hobby, a new outlet to be creative. And it creates a sense of pride—to make something for yourself.

I also started making waist beads again. I made myself two new pairs today, and I may start selling them again.

I’m kind of just trying to fill the days and the time. I’ve been out of school and work for the last week almost—I got sick—and everything feels much slower. In limbo. But I like it. Living slow and soft. I’m too young to be living as fast and be as stressed as I am, but alas.

I go back to work tomorrow morning, and back to school on Wednesday, and the chaos begins again.

I’m really proud of myself. For where I am in my life. Thirteen year old me is surely losing it. She wouldn’t recognize me. She wouldn’t be able to believe that we grew this much. Became this bold, this confident, this powerful.

Because that’s what I am. That’s how I feel.

I really have stepped into my greatness.

Each day I wake up and set my feet on the floor and thank God and the Universe for another day, I step into it a bit more.

I feel good.

Still anxious—college is all I can think about—and still have an overflowing to-do list. But my room is clean. I’m picking up crochet pretty fast. I’m drinking warm green tea.

So cheers to the little things. Cheers to growth.

And happy Monday my lovelies.