Cheers To The Year We Lived

Hi hi, my lovelies.

It’s been a while.

(And it’s currently 11:00 p.m. as I’m writing this—so you already know the vibes.)

I’ll be the first to admit: I’ve been a little awful about consistency with my content. And with the new year creeping in, I know—we’re all tired of the “new year, new me” speeches. But genuinely? I feel like a new me.

I meant to do a “What I Learned This Month” list for every month this year. That… did not happen. Life happened, you know?

And this year—whew. Life really happened for me, baby.

Good and bad. Heavy and beautiful. And when I look back on it now, it all just feels… good.

December has always felt like a season of reflection to me. Winter settling in. Holidays wrapping us up. The semester coming to a close. So let’s reflect, shall we?

How the Year Began

This year started off… kind of awful.

I was broken up with on New Year’s Day. And I was heartbroken. Like HEARTBROKEN. Like playing “Hours Lost” by Chase Atlantic on repeat, crying in the shower, replaying every memory kind of heartbroken.

The funny thing is—I hardly remember that guy now.

I think my friends remember him more than I do, honestly. And that says a lot.

I completely forgot about that breakup until I saw my Spotify Wrapped and realized “Hours Lost” was my number one song. I played it all year because, yes, it’s absolutely a banger—but that breakup was when I was really deep in it. Seeing it on my Wrapped made me pause and think, huh… interesting.

So my year started at a really low point. The first few months were dark and heavy, and I won’t pretend otherwise.

But everything that came after?

Where I Am Now

I feel like my life is starting now.

In writer terms, it feels like I’m finally out of the grueling planning and outlining phase—and I get to actually start writing.

In theatre terms, Act One is over. Intermission is ending. And you know Act Two is where things really get good.

For a long time, my self-worth and identity lived in other people. And this year, I finally started becoming a whole person.

Loving myself as a whole person.

Discovering myself as a whole person.

My health has always been a struggle, and this year I hit some of my highest highs and lowest lows. But they taught me so much.

I met people.

I loved people.

I lost people.

I lost friends. I buried my uncle. My grandmother got terribly sick for weeks, and I was so afraid. All I could think was, “Is this it? Is this when I lose her?”

I didn’t.

And because of that, I learned to cherish her—and everyone in my life—so much more deeply.

I have a tendency to self-isolate when things get hard… or honestly, just in general. This year, I learned to connect. To reach out. Even if it’s just to say, “Hi. I’m thinking of you.”

What This Year Gave Me

This year, I learned to love without reservations. Without chains.

This year, I learned to step outside my comfort zone.

This year, I learned to embrace all the colors of me.

This year, I dyed my hair for the first time—three times, actually. And I finally found a color that feels like me. Like who I am in this season of my life.

This year, I admitted to myself the life and career I want—one I know many people would judge me for—and I committed to working toward it anyway.

This year, I began dance and vocal training again.

This year, I turned eighteen.

This year, I was accepted into my dream colleges.

This year, I worked myself until I was bone-tired—and learned that exhaustion feels so much better when it comes from something you love.

This year, I stepped further into myself. Into the love I have always deserved. And into the future I know is waiting for me.

Closing the Chapter

I’m proud of the twelve months I’ve lived.

I’m proud of the seventeen years that came before them.

And I’m excited for all the ones still to come.

I hope you are, too.

I hope you learned to love yourself a little more this year. To hold yourself a little tighter.

I’m holding you virtually—with consent, of course. Can you feel it? Let me love you. You deserve it.

Cheers to 2025, my lovelies.

Let’s greet 2026 with open arms.

With love,

Lyssa 🤎✨